Bombe surprise.

Apart from the basic concepts upon which our Order is founded (see chapter The DeViety Code) you've got to go a long way before beating the normal, sane teachings of the Islamic world. Their 5 pillars, the development of mathematics and their protection of children's rights are among many aspects that are to be admired. However, I'm still very concerned about the recent exposure in the UK and Australia of medical terrorists from the murky world of fundamentalism.

The UK's esteemed new Prime Minister said on TV this morning that we must pay tribute to our emergency services and the public for avoiding carnage this week in discovering and dealing with the bombs in London and the conflagration in Glasgow. Cobblers. What he was actually doing was bigging us all up in a vain attempt to conceal yet another cock-up in the intelligence and security world. The whole point of such services is to let us know about these things before they happen, not to crow about how well it was dealt with afterwards, especially when nothing happened. As I see it, it was the terrorists' ineptitude that saved lives on this occasion.

However, the doctors who may've turned me into a walking time-bomb (see Bums and Causes in this blog page) might have done immeasurable damage elsewhere and been far from inept in their tactics. Just think about all the major, invasive surgery they've done over the years. By switching tubes in us that should suck instead of blow, by implanting hormone reversal bio-technology so that women go off sex after having children, by wiring up a bloke's penis directly to his eyes and nothing else - the implications of all this tinkering is mindblowing and the means of undermining our society are virtually endless. Scientists within the Order are working on the theory that fundamentalists deliberately introduced MRSA and C Difficile into our hospitals too, since it seems obvious that most people come out with more than they went in. The switching of pipes and tubes in us may also account for the fact that most politicians talk out of their arses.